The Ride

Psalm 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, O God! And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

During my quiet time this morning, the Lord graciously reminded me of my serious need of a "renewed spirit" lately.
I have been trying to proess all the emotions of leaving Spain, and heading back to Texas. With great joy, and at the same time, with great sadness, along with some "knawing in the ol' gut..."

I kinda feel like I am riding on that great big roller-coaster. Almost reaching the top of the HUGE hill....
You know the feeling, a bit anxious, alot thrilling, checking ( and re-checking) that harness (that you hope will keep you safe inside the little car,) your stomache kinda in knots, trying to peer over the front ( but yet, just a bit afraid to see what you already know is inevitable- a huge, scary, drop!!!)
Its coming, coming, slowly, you can even hear the gears grinding, breaks tightening, and the tracks below you getting s-l-o-w-e-r and s-l-o-w-e-r... You can hear the "click click click" of everything on the roller coaster all working together, in preperation for the big thrill!

And then, you reach the top. The breaks let up, and off you go.........Way fast down the hill! All to enjoy the ride ( after you re-locate your stomache...) that you know in the end will all be "worth it.."
Kinda how I am feeling these days.
Excited, nervous, ready for ride ( ohh, ya... I am ON the ride...) ready to " reach the top" with great anticipation of how it is gonna feel reaching the bottom.

But most of all, trusting God, that He did in fact give me the seat. He himself, made sure, through His loving care, that my harness has always been( and will) stay securily fastened, and that my little family and I will reach the bottom with great joy! I need to remember through-out all of this, to keep my spirit "in check" and trust in the knowledge that this part of "the ride" is too, all part of His plan.
And, this girl sure doesn't want to miss ANY of it!

Love,
jenny